Losing my father so suddenly one warm fall day in September 2022 shook me. I was still reeling from the death of a dear friend, and it was grief piled on grief. How was it that the outside world could just carry on, buzzing around me, while it seemed that time had stood still in mine?
I got to thinking about how when a celebrity dies, we pause for collective mourning. Tales are told, some true and some not so much. Donations are made to their favorite charities. Candles are lit. Flowers, cards, and tokens are sometimes left. The news and social media coverage is endless. We honor them by sharing how they made an impact on our lives.
But what struck me is a sense of injustice in the light of my grief. Why aren't we behaving the same way when the everyday people die? Why aren't we telling the stories of ordinary people? With that question an idea began to percolate. What is stopping me from sharing the story of my father's life? The answer, of course, is nothing.
I am not certain where the idea of a quilt came from. I mean, I have owned a sewing machine and been using it for small beginner projects for exactly four months. How hard can it be to jump from making neck gaiters, mittens, and potholders, to a full-sized quilt? (Quilters, feel free to laugh loudly.) I wanted to make something for my mom that might give her some small comfort. After almost 58-years of marriage I imagine two hearts beat as one. So, enter the quilt.
Each square will be a memory. She will be able to follow my dad's story from square to square to square. For example, when I was small, my dad told me that sharks lived in the canals that irrigated rich farming land not from where we lived. Of course, we were about 2,500 miles from the nearest shark, but I couldn't read yet. I called sharks "sharpie fishes" and it was some years before I learned not much of anything lived in those canals. So that quilt square with sharks on it? It's the sharpie fish memory.
I hope you'll follow along as I navigate grief and a project that I have clearly underestimated. There will be tears, love, and laughter as I regale you with the story of My Father's Quilt. I warmly invite you to send me the story of someone you have loved. It would be an honor to read and share them.
In love, adventure, and storytelling,
Peg
